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Living A Lie – Fathers who Doubt Paternity


Paternity testing is clearly a positive tool when it comes to determining who the biological father of a child is. It can help define issues such as financial welfare and emotional responsibilities. But often paternity DNA testing is not used in such a positive way. Clearly, if there are doubts about who the biological father is, there are doubts about the relationship of the couple in question. Carrying out such a test clearly indicates a degree of distrust.

Is it in the Best Interests of the Child?

There are some therefore who argue that this test isn’t in the best interests of the child. If a couple is in a loving, committed relationship and the man is happy to bring the child up as his own – what does it matter? The problem of course is that it isn’t always possible to predict a relationship will last, no matter how stable it may seem. And when relationships break down, the truth can emerge – often in an unpleasant way, such as through arguments between partners or worse, through an argument with the child in question.

Living a Lie

If a child discovers they have been ‘living a lie’ it can be incredibly damaging for all concerned. There are however opponents of this test that say biology shouldn’t matter – that what makes a father is more then just being a sperm donor. However, there is no denying the strength and bonds between biological parents and their children.

Outlawing Paternity Fraud

Bills have been passed in some American states that are aimed at outlawing paternity fraud. Secrets in families are nothing new. Family homes have been described as steel meshes where controlled bomb explosions take place. Families can be explosive, damaging and hurtful as well as supportive, necessary and loving. Living a lie or keeping secrets about paternity is felt by many to be morally and ethically wrong. Children have the right to know about their genetic make-up and paternity testing should be encouraged. As one famous quote says: “Children are afraid of the dark. Adults are afraid of the light.”